Restoring Trust
by cifan
Summary: Set after Betrayed Season 7 . Bobby and Alex work through the fallout from Purgatory. BA. Also, spoilers for Lady's Man in chapter 3 & Alpha Dog in chapter 4.
1. Chapter 1

**Set after Betrayed. I've watched that episode at least a dozen times, but this time it suddenly inspired me (same goes for Untethered, I'm working on a story for that epi as well). **

**Spoilers for Purgatory. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own them, damn it.**

It was her silence that was killing him.

"I hope it was worth it, Detective". Those were the last words she had spoken to him. Well, other than the complete blow-off "yup" that she managed to utter as she grabbed her coat and dashed out the squad room and out of his life. Those were the words that woke him up every night in a cold sweat, panicked that they would be the last ones he would hear from her.

After Alex left the observation room that day, she quickly requested, and was granted, vacation time. He spent the first two days showing up to work, expecting her to be there, and when she didn't show he didn't feel it was his place to ask Ross about it. But by the third day, he got up the nerve. That's when he learned she was on leave for two weeks.

He tried to call her only once. He knew she wouldn't answer, and when the call went to her voice mail, he hung up. Then he felt bad he about hanging up, so he almost called back to leave a message saying he was sorry for hanging up, but then he thought better of it. His last apology failed miserably, why would this one be any different?

He had two thoughts that were making her absence bearable; she hadn't requested a transfer, and he believed that once they had a case to work on, their partnership/friendship could begin to heal. So when Ross' call came about a missing person, Bobby couldn't get out of bed fast enough.

"A missing husband case? You need both of us on this?" Her words shocked him and he couldn't help but look at her with stunned disbelief. Then when she walked away from him as she went to speak to her, his disbelief turned to anger. He'd just about had enough.

The drive out to the lot where Woody's car had last been seen was tense to say the least. He had decided before they got in the SUV that he needed to say something. After all, there will be no healing until they talked it out. It had to start somewhere. "Is this the way it's gonna be from now on, Eames?"

"Excuse me?" Her caustic tone, coupled with her death glare, gave him his answer. But for him, it was unacceptable.

"Look…we need to talk about this."

"No, we don't." She didn't look at him, she just kept driving.

"Yes. We. Do." He couldn't help but hold his breath as he waited for her response to his insistent tone.

His persistence seemed to have warmed her icy demeanor, but only slightly. She wasn't expecting that from him. She figured he would try to sweep the Testarossa incident under the rug. In the nearly two weeks since their confrontation, he only called her once. She had thought that he would chalk up that message-less call to 'trying', and then move on. So when she attempted to shut him down, and he pushed back on her, she felt a little less angry; a little more hopeful that maybe they might be able to repair…whatever the hell someone would call their relationship.

"Not now."

They were only two words, but he heard it, the change in her voice; she was softening. He gave a quick nod, "Okay." Then he slowly let out air out of his lungs.

The rest of the ride was quiet, both lost in their own thoughts. He was trying to focus on the case, she was left to continue her contemplation of just how to define their relationship. She'd been aware for some time that Bobby had grown quite attached to her. But at the same time, the more attached he became, the more he closed himself off. She understood it, but it did frustrate her because as much as she tried not to let it happen, she was having the same problem that he was. Her feelings for him had changed over the years; and she never expected to feel the way she felt.

There was something about Bobby that wouldn't let her walk away from him. There was something about Bobby that pulled her to him. As their partnership went on, he'd established a firm hold on her; mind, body, and heart. So his recent betrayal nearly destroyed her, and she had no choice but to cut ties with him for a while. She was trying to use those two weeks as a type of detox; a fourteen day Bobby Goren cleanse. She thought it was working, but hearing him fight for them to talk about what happened undid just about all the progress she thought she had made in purging him from her soul.

After their brief conversation in the car, and the investigation in the abandoned yard, Bobby felt a change in their chemistry. Just as he had hoped, the case was bringing them the comfort of the routine and rhythm that their partnership thrived on. Then their time in the bodega, questioning the shopkeeper, further buoyed his optimism.

"You're exactly right, Eames." Her head shot up and she looked at him in confusion as he continued. "No, I'm just sayin', you're…you're right."

The look of confusion on her face gave way to dawning. She got was he was really saying. She nodded and walked away, but as he followed her across the street, he couldn't help it when he added, "But we still need to have that talk."

She turned back to him and he was rewarded with the first genuine smile he'd seen from her in months. His heart pounded out a few extra beats while his stomach swirled around, and as much as he didn't want to seem too eager, he smiled back at her.

They had been watching video footage of Avery at her ATM. They were sitting against their desks and their legs were so close that he would swear he could feel heat coming off of hers. Then the captain came in and told them that they were off the case. Then Eames was handed a report and while Ross was walking away, and while she was still looking down, she casually leaned her hand up to Bobby and pressed it against his arm to get his attention. She got his attention alright. Aside from undercover work, he could count on one hand the number of times that she'd intentionally touched him. He responded by leaning in and reading over her shoulder. Feeling the need for more contact, he tried to lean his shoulder against hers but she was already standing and walking so he followed behind her. They tried to convince Ross to let them continue their investigation, and luckily he said yes.

After a confrontation with Roy, and an interview with his mistress, Goren and Eames were really hitting their stride, and then they were off to Maine to interview Avery's family.

On their way back to New York, they were somewhere in the middle of Massachusetts when Alex unexpectedly pulled off an exit.

"Coffee break?"

"More like an 'us' break."

He did a double take at her and he suddenly felt very anxious. He pushed for this talk to happen, but he wasn't expecting her to choose right then to take him up on it.

"You sure? I mean, we can wait until we're done with the case."

She heard the edge in his voice and waited until they were at a stop light to answer him. "I think this is too important to put off any longer, don't you?"

He licked his lips and looked out the passenger window for a while in silence. Then he pointed to somewhere off to his right, "There's a park over there." Alex was relieved to hear his reply. She was afraid he had changed his mind about talking all together.

She had thought about having the talk before they got to Maine, but decided against it only because she was afraid of the feelings this talk was going to dredge up. Lately when it came to her and Bobby, Alex felt like she was wearing her emotions on her sleeve. So the thought of having an emotionally charged conversation with him, one where her feelings might be exposed, then being alone with him overnight, did not sit well with her. Instead, she managed to keep a professional distance from him on the way up to Maine, but she felt it was important to clear the air before they got back to New York.

Bobby, on the other hand, didn't know what to think of Alex. He had noticed that even though the frigid air between them was thawing, she was still having a hard time making eye contact with him. All he was getting from her were brief glances and she did most of her talking while looking in another direction. He didn't know what that meant from her. But, he was desperate to regain their connection, so he shook away his apprehension about the impending talk and braced himself for whatever she felt she needed to say. He also silently encouraged himself to speak his mind as well. What worried him the most was how he would handle if it became apparent that their conversation was heading in a personal direction. He wasn't a stupid man, and he knew Alex wasn't stupid as well. There were markers that, over the years, both had subtly left for the other. Sometimes it was a look, or an unnecessary extra touch while undercover that made the other aware of an undercurrent that simmered between them. Whatever it was, it was why he worked so hard to get his badge back, and it was why she was hurt so badly by him not letting her in on the operation. It was also what he thought might be exposed by them as they settled into their little spot in the park, somewhere in heart of Massachusetts.

The day was bright and the heat from the sun felt good against her skin as she stepped out of the car. There was gentle breeze that kept the temp from feeling as warm as it should have, but it felt nice just the same. She had had her leather jacket on, but as she stood up in the parking lot, she took it off and left it in the car. She had on a long sleeved black shirt with a with a scoop neck, a pair of black jeans and her wide black belt. Her heels brought her up to the height of his shoulders as she stepped around the car and along side of him. He opted to leave his sport jacket on but undid another button on his shirt as he led through the lot.

Since it was in the middle of the week, the park was quiet. There were only a couple of moms there with their kids, and a man sitting at a table having his lunch. They walked through the playground and passed the man, then they found a path which they followed along until they came to another picnic table that was in a small clearing. She began to slow down, indicating she didn't want to walk any further, so he leaned against the end of the table, spread his legs wide, and took a deep breath.

**TBC…**


	2. Chapter 2

--

"Alex - " "Bobby - "

"You go first," they both said simultaneously.

They both paused. Alex turned her face into the breeze and pushed her bangs to the side. He watched her until she glanced his way, then he cast his eyes to the ground and kicked around a few pebbles.

She grew a little impatient with his silence. "Well? You suggested we talk."

She was right. He did. He looked back up at her.

He bit his lip as he worked through how to begin. "That day…in the observation room…I couldn't even get a full sentence out without you jumping down my throat."

Her eyebrows shot up. "Bobby, I could have killed you! What reaction would you have expected from me given the situation?"

He tilted his head before he answered her. "So, you - you were more upset about that than about not being told about the operation?"

She let out a loud sigh, doing her best to remain calm. "Of course I was, Bobby. Can you imagine - " She didn't allow herself to finish her thought out loud, and she was so upset by the thought of almost killing him that she began pacing. "I mean, I was hurt by not being told - by you not telling me - about being undercover. I thought we were close enough that you would let me in despite what Ross or Moran ordered. And you understand that by not telling me, I almost shot you."

He watched her pace and rant. He thought carefully before he replied. "You have to understand that while I knew you were investigating the tourists being killed, I never expected that you would be the one to burst through that door."

Her voice hitched as she fought back the urge to scream or cry. "And that's what bother's me the most! Like I said that day, what if it wasn't me? What if it was some one who didn't know you?" She stopped pacing then closed her eyes and covered her face with her hands before she tried to continue. "Bobby..." Her tears fell in earnest while she kept her face hidden.

He not only saw it, but he felt her desperation. He ached for her and what she must have gone through that day. He reached for her arm, "Come here, Eames." But she leaned away from him.

Not about to be rebuffed, he leaned forward again, looped two fingers into her waistband, and pulled her toward him. She first felt his fingers slide inside her jeans and then she felt him tug her closer to him. She didn't fight him, she didn't want to. She could tell his face was right next to hers. "Put your hands down for me." She felt his breath against her cheek. She took a shaky breath and slowly removed her hands.

Their bodies were almost touching, her face was only inches away from his. He stared intently at her. First at her closed eyes, and then at her mouth. His mind was struggling with what to do next but his body knew exactly what it wanted. His breathing became shallow and the butterflies in his stomach took over his whole chest. He knew it wasn't right. His gut was telling him he should stand up straight and get some distance between them, but he chose not to listen to it. Instead, he went with his heart.

Her eyes were still closed but she felt him remove his fingers from her jeans, and then he buried his hands in her hair and gave her a tender kiss on the lips. Their lips lingered together before he moved his mouth away and kissed away her tears. "Eames," he said in between kisses. He kissed her lips once more before he was done.

When she felt his first kiss, she thought her legs were going to give way. His lips were warm and soft against hers. She didn't try to deepen the kiss, but she also didn't pull away. She let him leave his lips against hers for as long as he wanted. Then she felt him kiss her cheek and she knew he was kissing her tears. "Eames." He murmured before he switched to the other cheek. His hands in her hair, his mouth against her skin, and her body leaning against his were rapidly undoing her. She was trying to fight it, trying to keep control, but every time she felt his full lips find another part of her face, she felt her resolve weaken.

Then she felt his arms wrap tightly around her waist and back. Going on pure instinct, she slid her arms under his jacket and returned his embrace. Her head was turned toward him, and because he was leaning against the table, they were close to the same height so her forehead rested against his neck. "It's just that…Bobby…you don't know how scared I was. I can't get through a night without having a horrible nightmare that I pulled that trigger. Every damn night, I see you lying there with your face blown off."

He rubbed one of his hands up and down her back while the other remained firmly planted on her waist. "Alex," he whispered and then he kissed the top of her head while she began to sob again and she buried her face against his chest. In an attempt to make her understand him, he opened up to her as well. "I have my own sleepless nights. Every night in my dreams, we have that fight when you walked out on me. Everytime I wake up, I feel the pain I felt when you walked away."

After a few minutes, she sniffled a little and he heard a muffled, "I'm sorry", and then she tried to pull away but he didn't release the hold he had on her. "Alex, I'm the one that's sorry."

Then, she had a bizarre image of the two of them sitting in that park for hours trying to one-up each other about how sorry they both were, and suddenly she was laughing.

Puzzled by the noise he heard her making, he tilted his head to the side to see her eyes. He was happy to see them dancing in delight. He released his death grip of her, and she brought her hands back around and place them on his chest. He was both amused and confused by her.

"What's so funny?"

"Us…We are. I'm picturing us standing here for hours trying to decide which one of us is more sorry than the other."

He nodded his head. "I think I could see that happening."

She wiped her nose with her sleeve and smiled at him. "And one more…I'm sorry I fell apart on you…it's not very professional of me."

He laughed out loud at that. "Oh, and this," he motioned between them, "is very professional."

She looked down at her hands on his chest and how her hips were pressed against his, and couldn't help but like the way it looked. She also liked the feeling of being in his arms.

When she looked back at him, the look in his eyes scared her. Not only because of what she saw, but because she was certain that she had the same look. "What are we doin' here, Bobby?" Even though she was questioning their actions, she wasn't making any attempt to move. He took immediate notice of that. "Well…I'd say that maybe we're giving into some…curiosity?"

"Curiosity? Is that what this is?" She sounded very skeptical.

He really wasn't ready to have the conversation they were having. "Um…no…no I think it's more than that, actually...But, um…Eames…"

She heard how painful it was for him to get out what he said, so she cut him off. Not only to end his suffering, but also because she realized that she, too, wasn't up for airing all of her feelings. "I get it, Bobby…it's okay."

They remained in each other's arms but were silent. He wanted more of her, but didn't know how to handle it. Was this the right time? Are there more unresolved issues between them? He didn't really know. All he knew was that she felt really good in his arms. He took the fact that she stayed pressed against him as a signal to try and kiss her.

But just as he began to kiss her neck, Alex took it upon herself to break the spell. "I'm glad we had this talk." As she said that, she looked at him and this time, couldn't ignore the desire she saw in his eyes.

"Oh god, Bobby."

He didn't answer her with words. Instead, he kissed her again. The kiss this time was more passionate than the first. They immediately opened their mouths to each other and while they deepened their kiss, he pulled her as close to him as he could get her. He couldn't get enough of her.

They rested their foreheads together once their kiss ended. He noticed they were both breathing heavily.

Alex was the first to speak, "That was nice."

"Mmmmm. And dangerous."

"Mmmmm."

He leaned in and kissed her again. She felt her control slipping away as she ran her hands through his hair. So when she felt him run his hand along her ass, she knew if she didn't put a stop to what they were doing, things were going to get way out of hand.

She abruptly broke their kiss and put her hands back on his chest. "This is not a good idea."

Her words felt like a knife in his gut, but he knew she was right.

"I'm sorry, Alex. You're right."

"I mean, we're just rebuilding ourselves, I think we'll confuse things…"

"I know…but I think we're gonna be okay. I mean, I feel better about us…don't you?"

She nodded, "Yeah. I feel good."

He rubbed her arms and gave her a teasing reply as quickly he kissed her neck, "You sure do feel good."

"Bobby." She gave him a look of exasperation when he came up from her neck sporting a huge smile.

"I know, I know."

She reluctantly pulled away from him, and he reluctantly let her go.

"We should get back on the road."

And just like that, they were back to work.

--

**TBC…**


	3. Chapter 3

**Spoilers for Lady's Man in this chapter. Sorry I didn't mention that before hand, but this story transformed into something more than I had originally planned. Oh, and I won't do LM the justice it deserves, but I couldn't ignore its existence since it's smack dab in the middle of my timeline. So, sorry in advance (I think I'm actually apologizing to the episode).**

--

Goren needed his own time alone after the twisted game his mentor played with him and his life. He took an extended leave from the NYPD after that, and during that time he didn't keep contact with Eames. He did, however, think about her almost constantly.

He thought about how lucky he was to have her in his life. Still. After everything they'd been through, and after everything he'd put her through, she remained the one constant that he could count on. And even though he was roughly fifteen hundred miles away from her, he could still feel her with him. He could feel her presence everywhere around him.

He spent quite a bit of time thinking about that day in Massachusetts; holding her, kissing her. It was a surreal event, but he knew it had happened because he could still feel the goosebumps cover his body at the thought of how easily her tongue slid into his mouth, and how natural it felt to hold her tight against him.

He also thought about the moment they stole after the Miles Stone case was well put to rest. The 'read' that Dean Holiday did on Eames did not sit well with either of them. Some might call his act bullshit, but the fact that he correctly read Eames like that made things rather uncomfortable for them, despite the fact that they worked effortlessly on not only that case but several there after.

But one night and after several scotches, Bobby appeared at her door. He told her he was there because of what Holiday had said to her, and then he pressed her on her true feelings about him; he needed to know if she was still harboring resentment about the Testarossa case.

This, of course, was after he did a different kind of pressing; up against her door while his lips explored the soft skin of her neck…

_"I won't lie to you…it's been a slow road, but it's…Bobby?…How do you expect me to concentrate when you're doing that?"_

_"Mmmmm, maybe I don't want you to concentrate."_

_She felt some irritation creep in. "Sorry, but I'm confused…Did you want an honest answer from me? Or just a little action?"_

_He immediately sobered up at the tone in her voice. He'd fucked up._

_After straightening up and rubbing his hand along the back of his neck, he apologized. "You're right…I'm sorry. I did come here to listen to you. But also…"_

_"What?"_

_"No…first, I want to know how you're doing…you know…after everything?"_

_She looked at him and closed her eyes. Then she opened them as she answered him. "I won't lie to you, after what happened with Dean Holiday, I was mad again. It was like all of my anger got dragged back front and center. I had been doing well with putting it behind me, but then he said those things…"_

_Bobby nodded. "I know. I felt so bad. And even though it might have been just a good chance guess, he nailed it…and he nailed us."_

_"He did. But you know, we had already talked and hashed out our true feelings, so I did end up deciding not to dwell on what he said. And slowly, things got better again."_

_Filled with nerves, he bit his lip while he thought of what to say next. "I mean, it's not good to dwell, but it's also not good to ignore how you feel."_

_She appreciated his effort, and his sentiment. "I know. You're right." She stood quietly for a minute before continuing, "And I honestly don't feel like I'm dwelling or ignoring. I feel like I'm just moving on. It's all I can do, and it's the best thing for both of us to do."_

_"Good." He said with conviction._

_"Yeah." She said with equal intensity._

_With his head down, he shuffled his feet around. On to the second reason that he was there._

_"Um…How would you feel, if maybe…someday…I mean…some time, I asked you out…you know…on a date?" The little boy look that he gave her melted her instantly. Any aggravation she had been feeling disappeared._

_She smiled softly at him. "I'd like that."_

_He let out a big breath and gave a quick, enthusiastic nod. "Good."_

_He turned to leave, but then spun around quickly, "Oh, and one more thing -"_

_He had her pressed up against the wall again before she knew what was happening. This time, she welcomed him. She wrapped her hands around his neck and met his embrace with searing intensity. Their kiss quickly became passionate and reckless. They both felt a more than a bit out of control._

_She grabbed onto his waist and started to pull him further into her house, but it was Bobby, this time, that put the brakes on._

_As they broke their kiss, he was breathless as he spoke, "Not now…not like this…let's do this right."_

_She knew he was right. She smiled at him and gave him a quick peck on the chin. "You're right."_

_He teased, "Of course I am…I'm Bobby Goren."_

_--_

They only went out on one date before his brother was killed. The few days that followed his killing, which included Bobby being investigated for Frank's murder, didn't lend to further desire to see each other outside of work. Bobby had retreated into himself, and Alex let him go. She knew he needed her to do that.

When he came back from his extended leave, both were happy to be together again, but they took their time getting back on solid footing. After a few months of missing her, he felt the time was right to pursue their relationship once again. He was praying she would welcome his advances.

They had just wrapped up a kidnapping case; one that morphed into an entirely different type of investigation due to a bizarre twist. It was late and they were riding the elevator down for the day. She leaned against the back wall while he stood in the middle of the car and turned toward her. His eyes caught hers and then he brushed his hand through her hair. She leaned her head toward his hand so he grazed his hand back along her jaw.

"Hey." She said softly.

The tone of her voice stirred something deep inside of him. He reached behind his back and hit the stop button on the elevator. The car jerked to a halt. She gave him a very inviting look. He moved closer and rested his hands against the wall behind her; effectively trapping her there. She in no way felt trapped, she was exactly where she wanted to be. He leaned in a little closer so his face was right in front of hers.

"I miss you," he whispered.

"I miss you, too." She answered back and he felt a jolt of electricity flow through him as she put her hands on his waist.

"I'd like to take you out again…spend some time with you away from here."

"I'd like that, too."

He smiled. "So…are you busy tomorrow night?"

"Nope. I'm free."

"Would you like to have dinner with me?"

"Mmmmm. Very much so."

"Good. Oh, and Alex…would you mind if I kissed you right now?"

"I'd mind if you didn't."

They smiled at each other and then he gave her a delicate kiss.

After, he stood straight up and cleared his throat before restarting the elevator.

"Do me a favor though?" Eames asked before they reached the lobby.

"Sure."

She ran her hand through his beard. "Shave that thing."

He arrived to work the next day clean shaven and with shorter hair. When she walked in and saw him, she couldn't stop her smile.

--

They had gone out on a few dates since then. He was very much a gentleman while he treated her to wonderful dinners, romantic walks around the city, gifts, movies, flowers…you name it, he spared nothing. But at the same time, he restrained himself like he'd never restrained himself before. Given their long suffering attraction to each other, he knew it wouldn't take much to spur them both on to pursue the physical side of their new found relationship. However, he didn't want to rush into bed with her. His reasons were purely selfish. He wanted to make sure that she was truly ready to take that step, because he knew once he had her, he'd never be able to let her go.

And then Kevin Mulrooney came into their lives.

They had been together the night before Boz Burnham's body was found; dinner at her favorite restaurant, and then back to her house for a Netflix movie. In his opinion, the evening couldn't have been more perfect. In fact, every date they went on drew them closer and closer, and he couldn't have been happier. He was so happy that he was finding it more and more difficult to keep his feelings to himself when he was at work. He almost impossible not to watch her. He would sneak peeks, or gaze at her as she spoke, take any chance to just look at her. He was chastising himself because he was certain that Ross was beginning to pick up on his new habit. He knew it was not professional, but he just couldn't help himself.

So when he heard her voice while he was squatting over Burnham's body, he quickly looked up and watched her as she approach the crime scene. Then he was momentarily distracted by the not so distant memory of her lying on top of him. Her tongue exploring his mouth with the gentlest sweep he'd ever felt and the sweetest taste he'd ever known. It took every ounce of willpower to get up off that couch and leave her alone. His willpower was killing him.

ADA Kevin Mulrooney appeared at the crime scene and Bobby's antennae shot up almost immediately. He called her Alexandra? He only knew one other guy that did that, and that guy was a putz who was after Alex, so Bobby was put on instant high alert. Then he saw the look on Alex's face and he knew what ever this guy's story was, it wasn't pleasant for her.

Alex was then treated to a first class sword fight between Bobby and Mulrooney. She knew Bobby not only making sure 'his was bigger' by insisting the crime went down they way he laid it out, not the way Mulrooney did, but he was also taking it upon himself to defend Alex and her honor. She couldn't help put appreciate his motives. She also certainly enjoyed showing Mulrooney the gruesome 'little man behind the curtain'. Bobby had a hard time not cheering her on as she lifted the bag for Mulrooney's benefit.

--

"Did you sleep with him?" Did he really need to know that? Was that really relevant to the case? Um, no. Not at all. But it was relevant to him. Especially after he walked in on a private moment that looked like it had nothing to do with the investigation. Also, he knew something was up when Alex, looking flustered and guilty, insisted that Bobby stay in the room with them. He didn't like that one bit.

So he wanted that answer. She blew him off when he'd asked her the first time, but he was damn sure he was going to get the truth from her.

"This bitch can gloat, but I've seen her broken -" After that, it was all a blur. Bobby's mind was reeling by what this little cross-dressing punk was doing to Alex. If he could have gotten away with it, he would have put his glock right into that assholes mouth and shut him up once and for all. But he knew he needed to appear calm, not only to finish this prick off, but for Alex's sake. He didn't want her thinking that Mulrooney unnerved him with his revelations because he was certain she must have been dying inside.

And she was. Alex was too proud, too strong of a person to let anyone in on the fact that her husband's death shook her to the core. Even right after he was killed, she tried to keep a stiff upper lip around everyone she knew. So when Kevin came into her life, he was just enough of an outsider, and just enough of a warm shoulder, to allow her to let her guard down. But as she stood in that evidence locker, she felt her façade being stripped away. She breathed heavily and refused to take her eyes off of Mulrooney because she couldn't look at Goren. If he was looking at her with anything resembling pity, she knew she would fall apart.

But then Bobby offered her the opportunity to handle the finishing touches on the scene. After knocking Mulrooney over, he dangled the handcuffs out to her and she willingly took them when she saw Bobby not looking at her with pity, but with thinly veiled anger.

She read Mulrooney his rights, and then an officer led the dirt bag away, leaving the Bobby and Alex alone. He was certain she would try to bolt, but she didn't. Instead, she braced herself against the table for a moment to collect herself, then straightened back up, looked him right in the eyes and calmly said, "Thank you."

He didn't know what to say. 'You're welcome' did not seem appropriate. He didn't really know what, exactly, she was thanking him for. Was it for how he handled the whole case? Was it for his support and lack of judgment throughout? Was it for not being offended when she blew up at him in the A.V. room? Was it all of the above? And really, she didn't need to thank him. After all, he plowed along, pissing her off here and there throughout the case, as if her feelings didn't matter to him.

No, he just didn't think a 'you're welcome' was how he should respond. Instead, he let his gaze lock with hers and he simply nodded at her.

He waited for her in the parking garage. He didn't want her going home alone if she didn't want to. But at the same time, he wasn't sure if she would welcome his suggestion that he come home with her.

"I really don't think that's such a great idea."

He was right, but he pressed on. "Well, it's just…I don't know if you should be alone."

"Why?" Anger rushed out of her and into her words, "Kevin's locked up. He's no threat to me."

"No, I know…but…I just thought that maybe you wouldn't want to…I don't know…be alone?"

She set her jaw, "I've been alone for ten years now. I can handle it."

He looked hurt, "That's - that's not what I meant, Alex."

"I don't need a fucking babysitter," she said as she brushed passed him and got into her car.

He stood in the middle of the lot and watched her drive away.

That's when he came to the conclusion that loving this woman was going to be the end of him.

--

Eames left the garage but pulled over the first chance she had and bawled her eyes out. She couldn't believe she was just so horrible to Bobby. She wanted his help, but after the scene in evidence, she was too afraid to show weakness again to anyone. Instead, she leaned her head against her steering wheel and wept uncontrollably…all alone.

--

**TBC…**


	4. Chapter 4

--

Alex was feeling awful about the way that she blew Bobby off after the Mulrooney case. She knew why she did it, but it didn't make her feel any better. And then when she finally did try to call him, he didn't pick up. She asked him to call her back so she could explain, but he didn't. She knew she'd made a huge mistake.

For a week or so after, she tried to talk to him, but he closed her off. He was hurt. She didn't realize just how hurt he was until she cornered him in the break room one day.

She looked around to make sure they were alone before she spoke. "Bobby…can we talk?"

"There's nothing to talk about, Eames. We're fine."

"Really? Because you seem fine at all."

"It's just your imagination." And then he was gone.

She hung her head down and sighed. She didn't know what to do.

A couple of days later, she'd noticed he was letting his beard grow back in. He knew she didn't like his beard, so she was certain that he was growing it just to spite her. Part of her wanted to slam her fists into his chest and tell him how ridiculously juvenile he was being by doing that. But another part of her understood he was doing it out of feeling hurt and angry. So she bit her lip and ignored him.

They caught a case soon after that, it involved a male model and an obsessive multi-millionaire. They both were able to set aside their personal feelings throughout the case and they managed to keep their investigation on solid footing while not betraying their private problems. But after the case wrapped up, Alex knew it was time for her to own up to her mistakes.

--

A night later…

She stood in his doorway, holding up a bottle of Duke DeGuerin's scotch.

"Where'd you get that?" He didn't want to seem too interested; not only in the scotch but in her being there. However, even though he was still upset, he really missed her. So he was most definitely interested in both .

"You really wanna know?"

He looked from her to the bottle, then back to her, tightened his lips and shook his head. "C'mon in." She followed him to the kitchen and waited while he took out two glasses. Without asking, he put a couple of ice cubes in one glass and handed it to her. He knew how she liked her scotch.

"Can we sit down?" She asked timidly. Despite being let in, she knew she was on shaky ground. He silently grabbed the bottle then moved into the living room and sat on the couch. She followed and sat down along side him.

He cracked the seal on the bottle, twisted the cap off, then took a long sniff of the golden liquid. "So...this is what a two thousand dollar bottle of scotch smells like?"

They tentatively smiled at each other, then he poured some into a glass and handed it to her.

He raised his glass to her but she put her hand on his arm to lower it. "Before we drink this, I need to apologize to you."

He shook his head, "Don't. It's fine." He was trying to act like what she did didn't bother him, but the tone in his voice changed once she brought up what she did and she could tell that he was hurt and angry.

"It's no where near fine! I was a complete bitch to you after we arrested Mulrooney. And really, even before that I wasn't exactly pleasant to be around…I snapped at you more than once during that investigation…when you were just trying to do your job."

He glared at her. "Eames," He said firmly, "I said it was fine so just drop it."

"Fine. Then cheers." She sounded just as angry.

She raised her glass to him but he just drank his without toasting. It was her turn to glare at him.

She decided right then that she wasn't going to let him get away with trying to stop their conversation. "You know, Bobby...you're not the only one around here that can pick up on people's moods...or their feelings."

"You don't say." His tone was sarcastic again.

She chose to ignore his anger. "Yeah. And I'm not just talking about how I acted with the Mulrooney case. I'm talking about this last case. You had a lot to deal with here."

He just sat on the couch, watching her. He didn't respond so she continued. "Duke…he hit a nerve with you for a couple of reasons."

This time she waited for him. He stared at her intently for a full minute before responding because he wasn't sure if he liked where she was leading them. Finally, he simply said, "Go on."

"I think his kink hit close to home for you. That maybe you felt like you were dealing with Brady all over again."

If he could have, he would have kicked himself. He let that show. Or, did he? Maybe she just understood him more than he realized. Either way, he knew she wasn't wrong. He also knew he had to acknowledge her. He couldn't ignore her or abruptly end the conversation. Not now. Not after how close they have gotten and after she just tried to apologize to him. He was still angry, but he loved her so he knew he had to try.

"It was…disturbing for me."

She nodded her head. "I get that…Are you gonna be okay?"

And just like that, she was letting him off the hook.

She wasn't there to probe his dark side, or force him to share pain he wasn't planning on ever sharing with anyone. She just wanted to make sure that he knew she understood him and that she wanted to know if he was okay. If he did want to talk, he could have and she would have listened all night long. But if he didn't, she wasn't going to push him. He fought back the urge to sigh in relief.

Instead, he leaned over and whispered in her ear, "I'm gonna be just fine." Then he kissed her cheek before he moved away from her.

"Good." She said softly. Then she took another sip of her drink before continuing. "You know…there was something else I couldn't help but notice about this case…"

"You mean, something else about Duke and Brady?"

"Nope. There was something else about this case that really seemed to...how should I say it...intrigue and frustrate you."

He looked at her, slightly amused at her attempt to read him, "And what makes you say that?"

"Well... I think you were intrigued by both Duke and Hamp. Here were two men that had the world by the balls. They were rich and successful, and they could have any woman they wanted...and they did." She took a sip of the scotch and put the glass on the table. "That intrigued you. You love to examine human behavior...and with these guys, you were able to look into the worlds of two men who were driven by their libido's, to the point of it being pathological...and, well...let's just say this was a case study you found completely fascinating."

He inwardly applauded her. She knew him so well

He didn't take his eyes off of her while he nodded. "Yeah...I guess that's true. Learning about what makes people tick...it's something I'll never get tired of." She reached for her glass again, and he took the opportunity to let his eyes wonder up and down her body. He really liked the white, v-neck sweater that she was wearing. It looked soft and a little fuzzy, and his eyes settled on the spot where the "v" came to a rest on her chest. He could tell that all he'd have to do was tug it down a tiny bit, and then he could run his finger along the upper outline of her breast. All his daydreaming took place in a matter of seconds, but he let his eyes linger one second too long, because when he looked back up at her, she was smiling at him with a look that said, "caught ya!".

He turned red and cleared his throat and tried to turn her attention away from him and his leering. "So...why do you think I was frustrated by the case?"

She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. She knew this one was a little more delicate to discuss. She adjusted a bit in her seat, tucked her leg underneath her a little more, then took her arm off the back of the couch and rested it on her lap with her other one. She looked down, letting her hair fall in front of her like a veil while she played with her fingers. "Bobby...there was a time, not too long ago, that...in a way...you were like them."

He was shocked. "Excuse me?"

She looked up at him, then looked back down at her hands. "What I mean is... you used to have that swagger. You used know that you could get any woman you wanted...at least that's how you carried yourself."

He wasn't really sure how to take her comment, so when he spoke again, he was quiet. "You - you mean...do you think I was arrogant and conceited?"

She slowly looked at him. She knew how important it was that he really understood her. "Conceited? No. Never. Arrogant? Yes. But, Bobby...you had every right to be arrogant. Your job needed you to be that way, it still does. But, I think we both know that the past couple of years have been tough on you, they've worn you down…physically and mentally. But before then, you had a way of taking over every room you entered, and owning every woman in it."

He quickly dismissed almost everything she just said and zeroed in on that last comment. "Every woman?" She looked at him but didn't answer him, instead she continued, "And I think you're frustrated by that. I think you miss being 'that guy'."

Now he looked concerned, and a little hurt. "So, you think I've let myself go."

She reminded herself that it will only help him if she was completely truthful. "Honestly? No."

"But you just said - "

"What I said was 'the past couple of years have been hard and you've let that show'...but I didn't say I think you've let yourself go."

He gave her a small smile, "Eames, you're talking in circles."

She pursed her lips for a moment as she contemplated her next words. "Bobby, just because you've aged and added some weight, it doesn't mean that I don't still find you attractive."

"Still?" She heard the suggestive tease in his voice again.

"C'mon Bobby, don't make this any harder on me than it has to be."

He laughed to himself. "No, I'm sorry...you're right. By all means, continue." She still heard the teasing and couldn't help but smile.

She spoke very softly. "Of course, 'still'. I've always thought that you're a very handsome man. Over the years, you've gone from being the kind of guy that turned every woman's head and loving every minute of it, to a man that doesn't consider himself good looking...probably considers himself a mess. And if I'm being honest, I like you this way a little better because you seem to have no idea just how great you still are. And to me, that is ten times more sexy than guys like Hamp or Duke."

"Really?"

"Really."

He sat for a minute, trying to digest what she just said. After all, she just told him that she finds him more attractive now than ever before.

After he mulled it over some more, he tilted his head and spoke. "So Alex, if you were out and you met me, Hamp, and Duke..."

She cut him off, she knew where he was going with his question. "You. I have never been attracted to guys like them."

She watched his lips curl into a wicked grin and she knew he was about to say something that was really bad, "Well…what if you met me and Mulrooney?"

Her jaw dropped but couldn't stop the smile form on her face. "That's a low-blow, Detective!"

He pretended to be serious, "No…No, I think it's a valid question."

She leaned over closer to him and raised her drink up. "Do you really want to know what it's like to have two thousand dollar scotch poured over your head?"

He shook his head and took a hold of her wrist. "But, Alex…you said yourself that you almost slept with him…I mean…you haven't come close to sleeping with me yet…so it makes me wonder if you liked him more…after all, we couldn't be more different…How could you be attracted to both of us?"

Ahhhhh.

Alex bit her lip to keep from laughing because she knew that this was no laughing matter. Bobby was not only still jealous of Mulrooney, but he had also obviously been wondering about this since she'd confessed to almost sleeping with the slime ball.

She lowered her arm, his hand was still wrapped around her wrist. She grabbed her glass with her other hand and set it on the table. Then she took his glass from him and put it next to hers. Still using her one free hand, she ran her fingers down his cheek and then over his lips.

"Bobby," her tone was gentle, "Kevin Mulrooney met me at the most vulnerable time of my life. I was a complete mess. And I'm ashamed to admit it, but yes, I did bare my soul to him. I needed someone to listen, and he did that very well. But…the truth is, it could have been anyone. There was nothing about Mulrooney that set him apart. I guess you could say that he just had the good fortune of perfect timing."

Bobby was soaking up every word she said. So when she paused, he knew she was waiting for a little feedback from him. "So…you're saying that you would have regretted it if you had slept with him."

She nodded. "Absolutely. I realized later on how lucky I was that the case fell apart, I would have made the biggest mistake of my life…and look at how he couldn't wait to tear me apart, to expose my past and show everyone… mostly you…just how destroyed I was after Joe was killed."

He removed his hand from her wrist and covered her hand with his. Then she turned her hand over and laced their fingers together. "Alex…you don't know how badly I wish that I had known you back then. And that I was the one you turned to. I wish I was the one to help you through your pain."

"I know…me, too." Then she lifted their joined hands and kissed his fingers.

"I will say one thing…" She fought back a smile, he knew she was trying to lighten the mood, she had had enough focus on her and her problems, "It sure was a lot easier to kiss him…you know…because he's so short and you're so damn tall."

He gave her a quick glance before pushing her shoulders back onto his couch. His body quickly followed. "Really…so you'd prefer him right now?"

He let all of his weight drape over her. Then he pressed his hips into hers and she instantly felt his desire for her.

Quickly realizing they had had enough talk, enough explanations, and enough apologies, she lifted her mouth to his. After a beautiful kiss, he moved his attention to her neck.

"Bobby…"

"Hmmmm," he replied absent-mindedly as he kissed her cheek and jaw.

"I don't want to talk about Mulrooney, or Duke, or Hamp any more."

"Good." His reply was muffled since his face was buried in her neck.

"Mmmmmm," she couldn't help but groan.

He moved his mouth to her ear and spoke softly, "Well…then what do you want to talk about?" His hands were sliding under her shirt.

The heat she felt as his hands explored her sent her reeling. "All I wanna know is if you will make us coffee in the morning…'cause I have a feeling we're gonna need it."

He paused, raised his face to meet her, "Are you implying that we're not gonna get much sleep tonight?"

"MmmHmmm," she replied as she gave him a sultry look.

"Good." He kissed her quickly, then looked at her again.

"Do you have any idea how long I've been waiting for this?...Waiting for you?"

She smiled at him and ran her fingers through his hair. "Actually…I think I do."

He gave her a quick nod then stood up and lifted her into his arms. "So then you won't mind if I move us to my bed?"

She kissed him, then smiled and whispered to him, "There's no where else I want to be."

--

**The End.**

**I can't tell you how I struggled with this ending. After Loyalty, I felt like I should fold those episodes into this story because the time line is so close. But after watching those episodes about a billion times, I decided that I'm not ready to tackle them. I've even been leery about reading fics that are about "the end". I've only read a couple, I guess I'm not ready to deal with it.**

**So, this is the end of this story. A big thank you to LadyBlueDevil86 for, once again, lending her eyes and opinions. I very much appreciate it! And, for Ouroborosnyder - hope this made you smile!  
**

**Anyway - thank you to everyone who has read, commented, story alerted, or story fav'd. I'm sorry this took so long to complete. **


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